Embracing the Shadow – an evolution of consciousness

Archetypes lie latent in times of peace, like a volcano.
When violence breaks out they are activated and consume anything and everyone that crosses their path.
It is hard not to notice unrest in the word at the moment; it’s everywhere, from economic depression and inflation, the earth shifting on its axis, extreme weather conditions.

There are rapid changes taking place in the world environmentally, politically, personally and globally. It is no secret that unless we learn to deal with these changes we run the risk of being consumed by anxiety and dis -ease.

The collective unconscious is shared by us all. A brimming reservoir filled with archetypes of the whole of humanity shared from birth.

Love and Fear, are two basic emotions. They arise without conscious motive, but simply from necessity to survive. The content of the archetype is basically unconscious. Transformation occurs when they become conscious or when they are being perceived.

Transformation relies on the state of consciousness of individuals within which archetypes have emerged. An archetype can be experienced as image or as emotion.
Archetypes cannot be brushed aside. They will always manifest.
When a society undergoes a change the manifestations of archetypes will alter.

Archetypes are highly contagious, they trigger our own patterns of wrong doings while we go on wrong doing; the cycle of hate and revenge alternates. Man does to others what is done to him; he is forced to take sides. And so a split occurs. This spit is the cause of much suffering.

'The psychological rule says that when an inner situation is not made conscious, it happens outside as fate. That is to say, when the individual remains undivided and does not become conscious of his inner opposite, the world must perforce act out the conflict and be torn into opposing halves' (Jung)

It’s time to wake up and be conscious.

Many people rely on gaining an illusionary sense of stability and confidence from external sources.There are more reliable tools for developing a sense of well being, and internal strength.A tangible immediate sense of reality does not rely on what we experience in the external world, but that which comes from within and is authentic.
The first step on this journey of integrating the shadow is to encourage people to transform their challenges and crises into opportunities for growth.

In times of crisis, people look for someone or something to blame for unrest.
"The sombre fact is that we are the cruellest and most ruthless species that has ever walked this earth; and that, although we may recoil in horror when we read in the newspapers or history books of the atrocities committed by man upon man, we know in our hearts that each one of us harbours within himself those same savage impulses which lead to murder, to torture and to war." ‘Human Aggression’ Anthony Storr (1968)

Ahimsa - Non-violence, Satya -is an expression of Truth and purity of power

"With Satya (Truth) combined with Ahimsa (Non-violence) you can bring the world to your feet… no institution can be made non-violent by compulsion. Non-violence and truth cannot be written into constitution. They have to be adopted of one's own free will. They must sit naturally upon us like next-to-skin garments or else they become a contradiction in terms.
Mahatma Gandhi

Violence is rooted in our consciousness. With reflection and awareness we can become conscious of the world we create. Firstly be acknowledging of how our inner judgements create conflict. There is no peace for those who have not conquered the shadow that lies within.

The two most powerful and negative expressions of power through humanity have been violence and greed. Aggression is an unavoidable facet of human life. Territorial rights demand the use of aggression. Wars between individuals and groups have not only been about territories, resources, and succession, but also about ideologies-religious and other. There have been differing atrocities through time many in the name of hate, religion, territory; they have all brought suffering and hatred.
Historically acts of greed and violence have had tragic consequences for individuals and those around them. The people involved have entered an altered state not about transformation or growth but a repetition of negative behaviour and the continuation of old structures that do not work. This exemplifies a negative use of power.

Aggression does not reflect human nature. It is the unconscious that separates us from our deeper nature. Targeting people or situations outside ourselves instead of looking within and taking responsibility for our shadow whether it is collective or individual prevents growth.
The riots during August in London became a playground for the unconsciousness.
The individual psyche in each of us is always moving towards health. Our deepest nature is not bestial, but divine.

Suffering is caused by holding onto anything, which no longer serves us. At a base level hate and aggression can be used as an outlet for the outrage of being separated or disconnected from others and ourselves. Because of the extreme discomfort of disconnection hate becomes another separating experience adding to a vicious cycle.

Hate and violence blocks a deep loving connection with ourselves and others. The world may appear more dangerous. More energy goes into defending and protecting which reinforces separation driving people further away from a conscious connection with the true self, connecting with the bestial, primitive survival instincts and a movement away from evolution.

The shadow represents the repressed instinctual energies that are locked away in the realm of the unconscious. They do not die or cease to function, but they are no longer directly expressed through conscious activity, they are enacted unconsciously sometimes with great force as demonstrated during the riots in London in August.

When we become polarised we become like magnets drawing towards us the opposite pole. We invariably attract those who embody our rejected shadow as partners, employers, colleagues, or neighbours who appear in our lives in relationships we cannot easily escape. If we have rejected our personal power others they will become tyrants.

We all need love and affection, needing to be heard and validated for who we are, and needing to feel safe and secure emotionally are some basic needs that allow us to grow up and function as a healthy adults. Many people have experienced some interruption in having their needs met while growing up. Many young people are aware that they are fast approaching adulthood, where they will no longer be protected by their parents and will become part of a dangerous and competitive world of peers.

Each of us has the capacity to make choices, in recognising this capacity we become conscious and empowered. An individual who has led a fulfilling life can slip and in a single moment cross a moral and ethical line that can destroy their ability to make choices and in some cases have them taken away. We have all read articles about the law abiding individuals that have been caught up in the riot. It is also possible for an individual who has been a source destruction and pain to others and themselves to make a transformation and make conscious choices in a more fulfilling direction.
The capacity for committing acts of violence lies dormant within us all. It is the ego that controls and keeps the 'bestial’ or ‘animal’ locked away; Jung termed this the 'shadow'.

Shadow projection is a mechanism to turn the 'other’ into the devil. (Scapegoating )Throughout time this has been used to justify war and violence and ill treatment.

Jung warned that all mass movements need to be treated with care and suspicion. The total psyche of the group functions below the level of the individual psyche, which sinks to a level of mob mentality. The visceral thrill is palpable by the crowds, watching and wanting to be part of something larger than themselves. Many people who got involved are caught in the moment of crowd mentality, swept up in a mania, an altered reality where certain types of behaviour is normalised.

The collective experience as a member of a group, takes place at a lower level of consciousness than if one had the experience alone. In a crowd, individuals are open to become victims of suggestibility committing acts of criminality and violence. Conversely groups can have positive effects if the energy is channelled in the right direction; it encourages individuals into performing heroic tasks, human solidarity being one of the greater examples. This has demonstrated with the clean ups after the wake of destruction, communities reclaiming their territory.
In a crowd one feels no responsibility or fear. As soon as an individual is removed from the crowd they are unable to create the previous state of mind.

As long as the shadow within us is not integrated, people will live within the constraints of archetypal instinctive aggression. As long as individuals do not deal with their personal shadow they will get drawn into the collective shadow and displace or project it onto others. It is blindness to abdicate moral sense, and to conceive evil as always outside the individual as well as the group.
These are some of the more common examples of how the shadow translates into symptom (and vice versa).

Symptom
Resentment of outside pressure
Rejection (“Nobody likes me”)
Guilt (“You make me feel guilty”)
Anxiety
Self-consciousness
Fear (“they want to hurt me”)
Sad
Withdrawn
I can’t
Obligation (“I have to”)
Desire
Hatred
Envy (“You’re so great”)


Shadow
Drive
Rejection (“I reject them”)
Resentment (of another’s demands)
Excitement
Outward focus (on others)
Hostility (“I’m angry and attacking.”)
Mad
Rejecting
“I won’t!”
(“I want to.”)
Self-hatred
“I’m better than I realize.”


‘The Integral Vision: A Very Short Introduction to the Revolutionary Integral Approach to Life, God, the Universe, and Everything’ Ken Wilber (2007)

When we come face to face with the darker aspects of humanity, metaphors through out time have provided a buffer in describing these encounters: the dark night of the soul, meeting your demons, skeletons in the closet, wrestling with the devil, having a riot…

Shadow work brings these parts of ourselves into the light of the day where we can accept, understand and integrate these hidden drives feelings, needs and potentials. They then become a part of us in a healthy whole way.

‘How do you find a lion that has swallowed you?’ Jung on the Shadow

The shadow by its definition is the unconscious that to which we have no access to. When we act without any real understanding, we feel an overwhelming urge or compulsion.
In order to meet the shadow the first step is to recognise its existence, allowing us to beak its compulsive hold.

To see a World in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower,
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an hour.
William Blake

What are the solutions?
The first step is of integration of all aspects of the personality, which is called the individuation process. The process of Individuation involves a person, integrating the contents of their psyche whilst being conscious. Leading to a discovery of the self, this has been described as divine and or authentic, the dark night of the soul.

Jung believed that reconciliation is possible when the two moral opposing poles are brought together. There is a second phase that Jung called the transcendental function. The transcendent function is the core of Jung's theory of psychological growth and the heart of what he called individuation, the process by which one is guided in a teleological way towards the person one is meant to be. The model suggests that psychological growth occurs through dialogue with the unconscious. This process has the capacity to balance what has been polarised within us.
Jung comes close to describing the Vedantic concept that the phenomenal word is illusion (Maya).
‘The universe exists in order that the experiencer may experience it, thus become liberated’
How to know god: the yoga Aphorisms of Pantanjali by Patanjali, Swami Prabhavananda and Christopher Isherwood (1969)


An exploration of the shadow in relationships will be taking place in North London 26th - 27th November 2011
It is open to couples and individuals.

Embracing the Shadow in Relationships

The Mileage of a Love Note or Poem

All Text (C) Aisha Ali 1997-2010 www.livingfromtheheart.co.uk
Aisha Ali exercises her moral right to be named and acknowledged as author of extracts and quotations.No extract may be reproduced in any context.

Sean Haldane, a nominee for the post of professor of poetry at Oxford, talks about his dual life as a poet and neuroscientist

“I now think poetry has more capacity to change people than psychotherapy”

Listen to presences inside poems. Let them take you where they will.

Poetry communicates human emotion; it is the voice of the heart. It is the language of joy.

Living from the Heart has been running for many years; Aisha Ali its founder has an integrative approach  drawing from Humanistic, Developmental, Transpersonal, Gestalt, psychodynamic and behavioural and cognitive Psychotherapy. It uses energy-based transformational psychotherapy combining breath work, energy work, yoga, Body Work, Art therapy, Drama therapy and Meditation. The programme focuses on relationships with self and others working with couples and individuals and covers a number of themes around relationship pro. Aisha has a deep grounding and understanding in all aspects of Psychotherapy, meditation and the spiritual path, and has a profound appreciation of how different spiritual practices and traditions fit together as a whole.



The Day before my return from running Living from the Heart in Italy, I saw a little girl wearing a retro T shirt in bright colours with Love is..... printed on it, it struck a chord taking me back to the Love is... comic strip created by New Zealand artist Kim Grove in the late 1960s, it began as a series of love notes that Kim drew for her beloved Roberto Casali. It became very popular in the 70’s and 80’s when sending greeting cards and leaving notes and poems was common place. The comic strip follows the various stages of romance, the first blushes of attraction, dating, establishing a relationship, power struggles, moving towards stability, commitment and co creation stages.

The innocence and simplicity of the image moved me, having just spent the week running ‘Awakening the Heart’ Retreat in Italy.

It summed up the week, encouraging people to do just the same, understanding the beautiful simplicity of Love, which can be turned into a struggle by our unresolved wounds and undeveloped identities.

The immersion in the creative process was a powerful way of exploring feelings, especially when it comes to the overwhelming emotions associated with loss, separation and trauma. The process helps people to find a new language to talk about love and relationships.

Communicating and stating intentions clearly in relationships, whilst not getting drawn into recreating trauma and conflicts is a tricky business.

This kind of language is in alignment with authenticity and truth, it is a language which is your own, and it takes you closer, not further away from, yourself.


The use of the creative process allows individuals to find an authentic language which brings people closer to themselves creating a place in which to state intentions clearly in relationships avoiding the recurrence of trauma and conflicts.



By trusting the wisdom of your heart and mind you can become stronger, more authentic and more loving. You will attract all that is right for you and the right relationships.



Learning through Joy is an option we do not always recognise, the power of Love is in its simplicity.

Living from the Heart Retreat

Le Marche ITALY

9th - 16th September 2010

Retreat for couples and individuals



Awakening The Heart is a gentle week long retreat designed to offer you a nurturing space to reflect, rest and renew offering an opportunity to obtain distance from daily life. It has been designed for individuals and couples who are ready and committed to reaching their full potential.

Love is... Universal



Italian: L'amore è...Spanish: Amor Es...French: L'amour c'est...Portuguese: Amar é...Serbian: Ljubav je...Dutch: Liefde is...Afrikaans: Liefde is...German: Liebe ist …Icelandic: Ást er...Croatian: Ljubav je...
Russian: Любовь это... (Ljubov' eto)'Turkish: Aşk ...dır.Persian: ...عشق یعنیFinnish: Rakkautta on...
Danish: Lykken er..



(C) Aisha Ali and Living from the Heart

Love is....Living from the Heart

All Text (C) Aisha Ali 1997-2010 www.livingfromtheheart.co.uk
Aisha Ali exercises her moral right to be named and acknowledged as author of extracts and quotations.No extract may be reproduced in any context.




Love is......the reason we’re here on earth.
Love is……difficult to define, although everyone thinks they know what it is.

Throughout our lives we need to receive Love, and we need to give love.
We first learn about what Love is from our parents' or caretakers. Hopefully we come to understand as adults that Love starts with ourselves before we can reach out to another.
As we develop as individuals we learn more about Love from everyone around us. Seeing and experiencing Love in the behaviour of family members and others. With the proper foundation of being loved as a baby and child, we grow to adulthood able to give Love and also to feel worthy of receiving it. Loving ourselves is a prerequisite for being able to Love others. If this does no happen the path to Love can be a treacherous one causing havoc in our relationships with ourselves and others. Many of us grow up Love impoverished.

Love is….giving, which occasionally can be used to control others we are in relationship with, which far from Love, unmotivated by Love, but by Fear, the opposite of Love, the realm of problems in relationships.

Living from the Heart  next workshop will be held on

10th - 11th July 2010

Deepening Relationships and Advancing Communication Skills

It will explore effective ways to become aware of these negative patterns replacing more Loving ways of being in relationships. Developing the capacity to recognise and accept differences from and similarities to other people. Helping us to understand others and ourselves, Embracing difference leads us to a better understanding of relationships with partners, family, and friends resulting in more open and accepting relationships.

Love is….a healing balm, because love makes you whole. Love is…..a place where you feel welcomed in the world. Love is…. a part of existence; it is inclusive. Love is…. an invitation, where you are no longer an outsider, but needed. Love is… feeling needed, by yourself and others, to be needed, is the greatest need. Nothing else can fulfil that great need.


(C) Aisha Ali and Living from the Heart